Monologue I have written so far.

Where are they? My friends, where are they? They should be here, with me. Not just leaving. They should be the ones who care about me. They're gone. Just left me, here. Its not the first time wither. Its everyday. I try, I try to speak to them. I have to act like I'm not that bothered, but it hurts. I'm done with the acting. I'm just as normal as them. As much as a human being as them. Why don't they want to be friends with me? What have I done wrong? What have I done that makes them hate me?

Maybe I'm not worth them. I'm just a waste a space. That's exactly what I am - a waste of space. I shouldn't be here. They don't want me. I shouldn't be here.

23rd December

We did two sessions on Bullying, one lesson and one after school.

During the lesson Sarah and Rachel choreographed their dance/mime and then I was brought into it.

We performed and then we got given feedback..

Most people really liked the whole concept and they got the idea about the 'exclusion' which is what we wanted to get across.

To improve they said I should come in before and Rachel and Sarah ignore me more than what they already do so.

I will learn the song 'Everytime' by Britney Spears to be able to mime in a part of it, before I go into a monologue which will end with me killing myself.

Then after school:

We decided how we are going to go into the different scenes, by having a bell go off as if the lesson has finished, walking around acting as your character, then the bell ringing again and then leaving. 

We also got the structure of the piece sorted. The structure of the piece was decided a while ago, but it needed writing down.

Finally, I got my monologue written, for it to be re-worded or whatever before performing.

Catch up on what we have done. 16th November 2010

We want to include different types of bullying, to show that there are different types.
These types include
- Physical
- Cyberbulling (Facebook)
- Exclusion (though to debate how much of that is self inflicted, perhaps include this?)
- Psychological
- Verbal


We decided to make different scenes and do the scenes in different groups
- Verbal
- Cyber
- Physical
- Paranoia
- Exclusion

I am in a group with Sarah and Rachel
Group 5 - Exclusion
Lesson objective:  Choose music and format of our peice.
We are doing 'Exclusion'
How does it make you feel?
- Lonely
- Worthless - self esteem levels = zero
- Like its the end of everything
- The final resort, laughing. You can't help it. Going crazy, ill, mental health
- its in the head?
- Stylized, the performance has to be this way because of the amount of people in the group.

We've decided to do a dance performance of 'Everytime' by Britney Spears as we feel the song expresses Britney becoming crazy and the lyrics could show how she was feeling. The monologue could also include lyrics from the song to link the two.

We'eve decided that possibly having the monologue before the performance could be cheesy, therefore it wouldn't work the way we want to express the performance.

2 November 2010

Our objective for this lesson is to focus on the dramatic device Narration and decide whether to use it in our final performance.

We have decided that this performance to now Learning Skills students and we have decided its going to be ready by the first week of December, therefore giving us a month in this project.

We could use narration on the person who was bullied.

Narration is used very well in an issued based drama, explaining inside feelings to tell the story on better understanding.

Formats of Narration

- through poetry

- thought track

- storytelling

- being the insider of the story, maybe the main character, instead of being someone from the outsider point of view.

- in a diary

- the words of the narrator are the thoughts of that person

- music could be the narration

- people around the main character tell the story

- possibly the bully could be the narrator

We the got given the task to be divided into two groups and then each group using narration to either focus on the bully or the victim. I was in the group of the victim, and we decided to use the format of narration, diary entry. there was 10 of us in the group, so then we decided to split ourselves into pairs to focus on writing a diary entry per pair. We decided to write about

- the day it started

- getting worse

- the worst part of it

- the excluding herself from life and cracking

- the final day of her life.

me and leanne decided to write the fourth diary entry, this is what we wrote

Dear Diary

I just wanted one person, one person to talk to me. It's horrible, school. I am just so lonely.They don't want to be around me. I can't handle this. I just don't get it, why? People aren't talking to me, they're talking at me. I just don't get it. What have I done? Why are people being like this? I just don't get it. What have I done? Why are they being like this? I just feel so lonely. The words they call me, the things they say. Its just so wrong. I can't do this any more. I've tried.

to be continued.